Was it really 24 years ago yesterday? The phone call is ingrained in my memory like it was only twenty-four MINUTES ago. Sunday morning, January 25, 1987, the phone rang as I was sleeping at our on-base housing unit in Yokosuka, Japan. I awoke, and answered quickly – the man on the other end telling me that I needed to come home. Completely disarmed, and wondering why my Mom wasn’t calling me, I assumed that something was wrong with my Mom. “Where’s Mom?”, I asked, suspiciously.
“Molly has committed suicide. You need to come home.”
I dropped the phone and screamed – my dog, Kuma, ran away from me. I’m not sure how much time passed, but I remember hearing my Mother’s voice on the phone screaming… “Kelly! Kelly!”
I finally picked up the phone and my completely devastated Mom confirmed to me that my little sister, Molly, was indeed, dead. The very first traumatic experience in my life, and I was worlds away from Baton Rouge, Louisiana. My husband at the time was on deployment on a US Aircraft Carrier, and I was worlds away.
It took the Red Cross (thank God for the Red Cross) twenty-four hours to coordinate my transportation home. Twenty-four hours that I was unable to sleep. Twenty-four hours in which I did not know “how” Molly completed suicide. Twenty-four hours for the rest of my family to coordinate traveling back to Pensacola, Florida, where Molly would be buried. Twenty-four of the most disturbing hours of my life.
In honor of Molly, 02/07/72 – 01/25/87, I post her own writing….
Look into the forest of problems
The tree of sadness, the path of death
All troubles begin here
As enveloped, we gasp for a breath
All life seems to end as one enters here
Everything is troublesome
A place that has no cheer
Then turn your back
And glance at the lake of hope
The wave of laughter
The lily pad of love
With which do you wish to cope?
Swimming in glory
You dangle in the sun
Until problems never present
Transform to one
Which way will you turn?
Pleasure or Plead?
Love and Laughter?
Or will your heart bleed?
by Molly Ann DeMarchis
Suicide is NOT the answer. It is a permanent solution to a TEMPORARY PROBLEM. Make the right choice. Molly chose to shoot herself in the heart with a .357... Our Mother found her. It forever changed our family.